A template for self-righteous government

In case it ever seemed like problems for Washington to supposedly solve are made up out nothing, you're not alone and you're not wrong.

Take, for instance, S.Res. 85, introduced by Sen. Warren this week. In the name of “the duty of the federal government to dramatically expand and strengthen” something, it simultaneously cites “critical public services and programs” as being both “critical” and “nonexistent.”

Think about that: Something doesn't even exist, and yet in the minds of those who want to “dramatically expand and strengthen” their power in Washington, they present their role as being “critical.”

“Whereas we are interdependent and, at various stages of life, everyone will give or receive care;”

Yes, tap into something everyone agrees with to lay the groundwork for buy-in.

Cite lots of statistics to make everyone feel like they're part of the issue.

Then, cite more statistics to divide people.

Then, blame the country for having not already fixed the supposed problem.

Cite more statistics to make it feel like the problem is impossible for people to fix on their own.

Cite statistics showing how current government programs are insufficient.

Make sure to present your next government program as a solution to all the problems created by previous big government programs.

Death. Always cite death numbers because then you make it feel impossible to argue against your government expansion program idea.

Mention lots of ways in which those who are still living don't have everything everyone else does. Covetousness is an easy path to more power.

Mention climate change. It gets scientists funding, and can get more government programs funding, too.

Even if the jobs you're talking about are among the “fastest growing in the the United States and represent the largest occupational group in the country,” make sure to mention that anyway because then people can't say you tried to hide that when they point to how unnecessary government “investment” is for these jobs.

For any doubters or “deniers” remaining, make sure to remind them we face “multiple crises” and therefore it's acceptable and necessary to make “unprecedented investments in physical infrastructure” even if that somehow extends into people's homes.

After dividing and manipulating people, make sure to go back to talking about how “equitable and inclusive” everything will be after the government makes the proposed “bold investments.”